They will, they will. But first you’ve got to hear again about how the Lions can’t wait to see themselves out there on Saturday in their new sponsor’s guernseys, playing good footy and spreading the word about the sponsor’s good stuff, which they’ll come to, all in good time.
The sponsor’s pretty excited, too. And proud. They see “some great symmetry” between themselves and the Lions, also “an incredibly good fit”. Ah, now we’re getting warmer. A bootmaker, maybe?
They’re both “growing and going somewhere”, sponsor and club. Airline, then? Car-maker?
Wait, OK? They’re both based in Brisbane, both proud to represent Queensland, this footy and club and this sponsor whose business is so well aligned to the footy club’s that there is hardly any need to say what it is.
But now we’re nearly at the end of the Brisbane Lions’ screed, and there is a bit more about the other major sponsor, Oaks Hotels and Resorts – who we deduce have a bit of a line in hotels and resorts – and still there is no elaboration on what the new sponsor actually does when it comes down to it, and we’re beginning to grow a bit suspicious.
Usually, there is succinct encapsulation. You know: “leading international smart phone outfit”, “renown apparel maker”, “insurance giant”. But from the Lions now, no formulation, not even a hint, just one word, which by itself is about as meaningful as “rosebud”. The whole idea of a sponsorship, so we thought, is to promote the charms of the sponsor, not hide them.
The Lions in their release couldn’t quite bring themselves to say it, but Google is not so discreet. The new sponsor is a fairly new player in an industry from which other clubs generally are running a kilometre, a fast-growing industry, certainly, but with a colourful name, an industry whose standard promotion is to depict young men as fools while offering ways to part them and their money.
The Lions never did manage to spell any of this out before they all suddenly had to go, and you could not help but wonder that when they say they’re proud to make this partly redacted announcement about this carefully obscured partner, what they really mean is, heh, look over there.